Connecting with You
By Teresa | March 6, 2009
Hi there,
Its Teresa here and I’d like to welcome you to the Infinite Women blog. I hope you visit often as Karen and I share some thoughts close to our hearts. I’d also like to invite you to join in the conversation by using the comments feature. Some of the greatest ways we can help empower one another is my sharing our thoughts and opinions with each other, validating, and encouraging each other. With those goals in mind, please keep your comments respectful. While it is great to share diverse opinions and thoughts, comments that are mean-spirited, abusive or rude. We’re all on a journey of growth and acceptance, right? If any comments aren’t reflective of that journey, we reserve the right to delete them.
Now that we’ve got the business out of the way, let’s talk about connecting with others and with ourselves.
As women, many of us are so adept at connecting its like second nature. We spend our lives as caretakers, solving the problems of everyone around us. One way we do that is by connecting problem solvers with problem havers. From passing on the name of a great sitter to using social media outlets to building our own businesses, making connections comes naturally to most of us.
What about connecting with our true inner selves, though? Where do you stand on that one? Digging deep inside, learning who we are at our core and accepting those answers unconditionally is NOT an easy task, but it doesn’t have to be difficult, either. In fact, it can be the most liberating thing you’ve ever done.
Throughout Infinite Women, our purpose is to show you how to make that inner connection and learn to truly love who you are - finally.
We don’t have to be paragons of virtue to be worthy of loving ourselves. No matter what your history has been, you can start at any moment to stop allowing it to determine your future. When we agonize over our past, we tend to dwell on the “if onlys” and the “woulda, coulda, shouldas.” As long as we continue to do that, we’re stuck trying to do the impossible and we’re bound to feel defeated. Here’s the scoop: not one of us can change one iota of the past. It’s done. It’s over. It’s finished. Let it go. Guilt, regret, shame- useless negativity that can ultimately destroy us if we let it.
Very few, if any, of us ever set out to make bad decisions, unhealthy or immoral choices or destructive lifestyle patterns. Instead, our decisions and choices are generally made from the best place we can make them - at that specific moment in time. Are you guilty of judging yesterday’s actions with today’s knowledge? I spent years of my life doing just that. As I moved out of living a self-destructive lifestyle, I would look back on poor decisions and beat myself up, wondering how on earth I could have been so stupid, so selfish, so wrong. The effect of that was absolutely nothing more than self-abuse. I would feel worse and worse, plagued with guilt and anguish. The emotional pain would fuel my ability to recall other unhealthy or unproductive decisions, which - yep, you got it- piled on more negative thinking.
When I learned how to stop dwelling on the things in my past, I learned I could create my present and my future to be different. When I learned I could trust myself, appreciate myself and accept myself, that present and future became filled with possibilities.
Take away point: The past is over. It is decidedly and completely unchangeable. No replays or do-overs available to anyone for any reason at anytime.
Whew! Take a couple of deep breaths and really think about that. NO matter how much you want to, you cannot go back and do things differently. That means there is no point dwelling on it any longer. NO POINT.
Decide right now- yes, right now- to be finished with your past. Accept the fact that you did the best job you could based on the specific circumstances of the moment. Accept the fact you are human and will make mistakes. Accept that fact you are unconditionally lovable- and then offer yourself that love. Connect with your inner self and love her.
Share your journey with us here, in the comments.
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